Two For One - Lessons Learned

If you never leave your 2 year old for more than a couple of hours and then one evening leave for 6 hours to attend a party until nearly midnight, you may very well get finger-stabbed in the eye...

If you want people to be super nice to you and even sympathetic during the Christmas shopping season, get your eye finger-stabbed.

The tiny abuser insists my eye is "burnt."

Free At Last!

She came, stayed awhile and has finally left. The Paci Fairy's kid sister...the Boobie Fairy.


Yes, dear friends, after nearly 4 1/2 years of nursing (holy CRAP!) my duty as a nutrition vending machine is finally over.


I'm too elated right now to be sad about it but I have no doubt there will be a tinge of longing for that unique mommy-baby closeness.


I've been asked countless times why I chose to nurse so long. With Isabella it was unintentional. She just kept going! Then she abruptly stopped when she was 19 1/2 months old and a few days later I found that I was pregnant with Ava.


With Ava, I promised her at least that same length of time for Mama Milk. Once 20 months passed, I started to panic a little. She was full force with no end in sight! Then I'd relax and remember that nursing for any child over the age of 6 months is about SO much more than nutrition. I provided comfort for Ava that no one else could. I take great pride in that.


There's no rule about nursing. What works for mama and baby is what matters. The past two months we've been dwindling those shared moments to nary a minute before nap or bedtime. She would pat my right boob and say "Dis one ehpty (empty)" and then the left "Dis one good!"


For some reason she and Righty became out of sorts because she couldn't nurse without tearing it. Yeah, did you just cringe? Mmmmhmmm...


About 5 days ago, we decided to experiment. That's the best part about parenting. Experimenting and then being so friggin EXCITED when it works out!


We let Ava lay next to Bella to fall asleep. Project Distraction.


She would tuck her chubby little hands under her cheek, squeeze her eyes shut to pretend sleep and then actually fall asleep! Magic! Knowing that she and her sibling were not at all used to sleeping together, I waited until she was sleep twitching before moving her to her crib.


We've done this nightly. I panicked a little because we went out of town but we tried it again and it still worked!


Twice, she has awakened and asked for Mama Milk. It was half-hearted so I gently told her that it was all gone and she could either lay back in her bed or snuggle with me. She opted to snuggle.


The best part of all this? No tears. No heartache.


My children have taught me that not everything has to always run according to my time table. If I allow them their own, we all win. Even if it takes a wee bit longer :)

Listen Up, Guys...

What not to say to a woman you've apparently been stalking:

"Pardon me for saying, but you are REALLY CUTE and probably married, huh? Don't worry, I'm not following you. Ha. Ha."

First of all, telling a woman she's CUTE isn't going to get you anywhere. Confirming that you've been stalking her by denying it certainly doesn't help matters.

Hubby thinks I should be flattered and carry some pepper spray along with an air horn.

Randomness...

First of all, today I heart Home Depot. Yes, the man store. I rarely go in there but Saturday was family day which means we are velcroed to each other for the entire day. That includes barber shop and the man store.

Last spring we got the hankerin (I'm Texan, ya'll) for a propane fire pit. The one we like was tall with a bar around it...for hot cocoa of course...and the pit was in the middle. $299. No thanks! Then hubby saw it this summer. $129. Ooooh...maybe. How bad do we want/need it? Not enough.

This weekend while searching for a spring loaded hinge at the man store, we saw the cool propane fire pit. For FIFTY SIX DOLLARS.

It looks really awesome in our back yard.

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I've never given a music review but I have to now. Did you watch the AMA's? Or did you flip channels and come across the New Kids On The Block trying out new sounds with their old songs? Me too!

Did you cringe? Did you laugh as Donnie Wahlberg attempted to rap to Right Stuff? Did you wonder if he's a wee bit jealous that Marky Mark grew up and is a talented director/producer?

Me too! Sadness, really. Movie sequels are rarely good but boy band sequels? Eeee... From 15+ years ago? Eeeeyew.

Stay in your decades, people! Let our memories remain as fluffy as your hair was, k?

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A child gang is after my daughter. They are ages 5, 9 and 10. They ride in front our house either on their bikes or their heelys (for you geezers, those are tennis shoes with wheels). Used to, they waited to pounce when the my girls ride their bikes in the driveway. Bella gleefully skips up to them to pick flower weeds, talk about school, run up and down the grass at the front of our yard.

Then dear husband hovered on the porch while Bella socialized for a good HOUR yesterday. WHAT? Doesn't he know that just sets us up for begging in the future??

Then today the door bell rang at 1pm. Ava was napping. I peeked out. The gang leader, 5 year old Justin, was jumping up to ring it again. I wished them away with all my might. Then he rang the dang bell 5 more times! This time I opened the door and his backup, 9 year old sister, was there. She merely said "It's us."

And?

Then she asked if "that girl" could come play. At least know her name!

I don't know that I'll ever let my children just run hog wild like these kids do and like I did when I was a kid. Not sure if that mama knows but these are far different times!

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Ava should just be nicknamed Mini B. She walks, talks and acts like Bella. Many say she looks like her too. But I wouldn't know as of late because this is all I see:

Something in the air...

I don't know how but it is not humanly possible for me to ever leave Target without having given them a hundred bucks.

I went in today with a list for 10 things. TEN. Then the One Spot drew me in. $5 there. No biggie. Then the sale rack for the OshKosh Genuine Kids (my favorite for the girls!). $11 there (one striped pant, 2 polka dot leggings). Not bad, eh?

The rest is a blur. All I know is that when it came to checkout time, my eyebrows shot up as the register did. $104.23.

DANGIT ALL!

That target logo is really hypnotic spend all-your-money trickery. I'm on to them now! HAHAHA!

So....see you next week with my hundred?

Oh, Thanksgiving Tree?

I'm chomping at the bit to decorate for Christmas. I think our home is it's prettiest when decked out in reds, golds, velvets and greenery. A crackling fire, evergreen candles, Christmas music classics played quietly in the background.

Love. It.

It is tradition for us to begin decorating the weekend of Thanksgiving. I just don't know if I can wait that long!

Plus our house is super duper clean because friends came over yesterday for a playdate. Their kids and mine, not us adults playing Barbie or anything. Though that might've been fun.

With all this cleanliness and lack of dust bunnies around me, it would be the best time to drag down the attic boxes of Christmas goods, dontcha think?

My friend, C, has a very Southern Living decorated home. It is picture perfect and I get jealous. I imagine any woman who enters her home leaves with decorating ideas and just a weensy bit of love/hate. (Kidding, C!)

Anyway, she takes about a week to decorate for Christmas. Any excuse I have during the holiday season to get inside her house is a good one. Decorated trees in every room! Greenery draped in the most perfect places. Stockings hung by the chimney with care. Sick. Like, awesome sick!

Not only that, C bakes Christmas goodies. Mmmhmmm. Feeling the love/hate yet?

If I could nominate her for one of those Better Homes & Gardens contests to show off her skillz, I would. Then she would love/hate me!

Though I'll be waiting until Thanksgiving weekend to decorate, you can bet your bottom that I will be accidentally on purpose visiting her home for more ideas. Copycat friendships are healthy, right?

Super!

Kidbits...

(Since Bella isn't really a toddler anymore, I think these snippets of funny should be retitled, don't you?)

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Bella surprised me this week by spelling "STOP" upon seeing the sign. I was delighted and we celebrated with lots of commotion on our drive to school.

After school, I got a good giggle.

Bella: Mom! I spelled "STOP" for all my friends and teachers. They were amazed. And guess what? (my children's favorite question) Mitchell can spell "STOP" too but WITHOUT USING HIS WORDS!

Her eyes were big as saucers with amazement at his tremendous gift of spelling. I asked her how that can be. She replied that he spells it with his mouth closed and points in the air for each letter.

She was so mad at me for laughing with his mother as I told her about her it. Ooops.

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Ava: Mama! Guess what! Mmmnn*inaudible* an hoses (horses) take NAPS!

Me: Yes, they do!

Ava: Mama! Guess what! Mmmnn*again with the inaudible* an hoses EAT!

Oookay...this could go on all afternoon, couldn't it?

Ava: Mama! Guess what!...

Me: Look, Ava! Want a piece of gum?

Works every time.

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Halloween was pretty low key but fun. We went with a bunch of other kids to two nursing homes. Yes, two. We're greedy? Let me just say though, that not all nursing homes are created equal and it is not only sad but really stinky (in the lesser of the two).

Even the little ones learned quickly how the trick or treat gig works. In fact, Ava's new little partner in crime would just help herself as long as the nice lady held out the basket. Considering most of these sweet people didn't move too fast, she got plenty of goods.

Ava polished off the candy as soon as it hit her bucket. Bella was too busy twirling and whirling, keeping tabs on friends and hitting up the lady by the popcorn machine for more (oddly enough, the dear woman was giving each kid that passed two kernels of popcorn as their treat).

The kids partied like it was 2008, gobbled up whatever amount of candy their tiny tummies would allow, then crashed before anyone could think about evening festivities. Fine by us. They didn't need those chocolates, caramels or gummy severed fingers anyway. Just let Mommy and Daddy take care of it all, my sweets.

I'll Take One Square Peg, Please...

Women intimidate me. Groups of women make me wish I was a turtle. Then I could just leap into my cozy little home when those women got scary and poke my head out to say hello when someone friendly drops by.

I have been attending a monthly mom group that focuses on community service, fundraising and special interest playgroups. A close friend is very involved and new friend I've made recently is also a member. Easy peasy, right?

Mmmhmmm...

After dropping off Bella without a look back (her, not me) and then handing off my screaming two year old to the very kind nursery worker, I hang around the front desk as my good friend C gets the little ones registered in the nursery. In part so I can listen for Ava to calm down (she does, rather quickly) and so I don't have to walk down the loooong hall to the big room full of women. My friend is awesome about introducing me to people but I swear the more I'm introduced, the more I am wishing for a shell to retreat to.

I'm a social tard. Why blame the other women? Most were friendly, some avoided eye contact, a few looked like they also wish they were turtles.

As the meetings go on, I begin to realize why these groups exist. We women often need a support group and sometimes don't want to admit it. Whether it is regarding our spirituality, our marriage, our children or various other reasons.

In this case, it is for our children as well as for ourselves. We all want to be the best parents we can be using fresh ideas and approaches, some old school but alot of it new. We want to set a good example for our children through community service, which is important for every citizen to be a part of. We want our children to see us socialize and become friends with those who may be a little or even a lot different than we are.

I like that. I really do.

So I will leave my shell at home, or at least in the car, and keep going to these meetings. It is healthy for me to continue developing new relationships and since I'm always harping to my children about acceptance of others, I should probably do the same.

Women can be alot of things but motherhood often helps us look past ourselves for the sake of others.

*gulp*

Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction?

This week at school was all about authors and books.

Bella and her friends wrote this cute little story.

Or...not so cute.

Should I be more concerned that the elephant's name is "Reno"...

that Mom is such a hardass...

...or just the state of healthcare?

Now I want to know what the other kids' books were about!

Party On, Dude.

What do you do when Daddy buys the wrong pull-ups?

Wear them on your head and dance, of course!

A welcome distraction from a very boring debate.

And apparently, a recurring theme in our home.

This is Bella in July of 2006.

Hubby is just glad I didn't post HIS picture with a diaper hat.

Terrific Two's! (wishful thinking?)

Sigh...my baby is a little less baby now.

Ava turned 2 last Thursday and her present to me? Peeing in the potty for the first (and so far, last) time in her life! We whooped and hollered like all kinds of crazies over it. She was quite pleased once she got over the freak factor of something leaving her body and traveling so far down.

Bella has taken it upon herself to be Ava's English teacher.

On the way to school Thursday, Ava was asking for her dad. Bella told her that Daddy was working and took the opportunity to help Ava improve her vocabulary.

"Ava, Daddy is at wuhk. Can you say wuhk?"

"Momma, what does "wuhk" start with? Dubba-yew?"

"Okay, Ava, can you say wuh-WUH- WUUUUUUHK."

Thank goodness they sit in the back seat cuz I was crackin up in the front!

Then we had a family party at our home yesterday. Just a little get together to stuff our faces and get sugar highs. Mission accomplished!

Ava is an inventor, did you know? After blowing at her candle (I had to blow it out) , she had the brilliant idea to use the end of the candle to scoop up the tasty chocolate frosting. How cool is that? Use your birthday candle as cake fork! The downside was when she got more wax than frosting in an eager bite, so maybe next year she'll come up with something better.

Her favorite present? Birthday Bear from her Daddy, of course!

Our sweet Ava Elizabeth. She's funny, sassy, smart and loving. I can't wait to see what she's got in store for us as a two year old!

The End of a Long Chapter...

She has finally come to our home and put an end to over 4 years of really awesome and pretty bad. We've been wanting to invite her over for a visit since we first heard about her but until 2 weeks ago, it seemed she would never be able to.

Who could she possibly be, you ask?

The Paci Fairy.

Did you know that she even existed? We sure didn't. At least not until 1 1/2 years ago when we were told that Bella needed to let go of her pacifier for good. We tried everything from "oops where have they all gone" to snipping the end off and hoping she'd find no use for it. Have you ever heard a kid desperately slurp on a tipless pacifier??

Desperate.

At 3 years old and up, that's what the relationship with a child and her pacifier becomes. More than a handful of times, my husband or I have had to make a mad dash to the store for a stupid pacifier because of the heartbreak and wails from our dear daughter. She would literally have panic attacks and convulsions if bedtime came and her beloved cigarette...I mean...pacifier was not to be found.

So for the last 1 1/2 years, we have waited for her mad paci sucking to stop so we could pop it out of her mouth for the night. Do you know what a pain in the butt that was?? Okay, not that bad really.

We are probably considered "soft" parents because we don't believe in pushing our kids to do something that isn't absolutely necessary or they are too far from ready to do it. Isabella has taught me that lesson because if she isn't ready for change, then it is an uphill and losing battle to attempt it.

I had cut the tip of the pacifier last year and for some reason decided to do it again 2 weeks ago. When she saw her injured love, she started to panic but then I told her that pacifiers are meant for babies and a broken pacifier just gets full of germs. When she asked if those germs get into her mouth and I said yes, the love her life was suddenly the most disgusting thing she'd ever laid eyes on. It was suddenly a long-term relationship gone really wrong.

Sunday night, the Paci Fairy in all her glittery glam showed up. She left a sweet, sparkly note for Isabella, praising her big girl choice to leave the pacifier for her so another baby girl who needs a cig can use it.

The Paci Fairy also left a beautiful wood Melissa & Doug castle for the big girl. Yeah, that Paci Fairy has good taste!

Bella was able to make the change when she was ready and she is darn proud of herself for it.

Now I am happy to report that because Ava never used the pacifier as more than a teething tool, we will not have to invite the Paci Fairy over EVER AGAIN.

However, is there such thing as a Boob Fairy? May need to contact her before too long. For several reasons...

Hey, Kids, Let's Be Tacky Today!

I like to think I'm a good influence on my kids. So last Friday I dashed all hopes of it. We crashed a birthday party at McDonalds. Oh yes we did!

The girls were promised a 1/2 hour at the indoor playground at McDonalds if they behaved that morning as we ran errands (which they loathe). We get there and I see a new mom friend that I met at my friend's Girls Day Out a month or so ago.

Turns out she was there having an impromptu birthday party for her 5 year old since Hurricane Ike was about to release his wrath on Texas and spoil her son's original fishing party.

Because she's super nice, she of course asked us to sit with them. Well, that rolled into snagging a couple of cupcakes, singing happy birthday (Bella met the boy once before) and walking away with two goody bags!

Needless to say, I feel a bit guilty. Perhaps we should've just gone to a corner table to eat and play on our own. But how could we when Bella's BFF showed up to celebrate too? I tried to politely duck out of all the mom's generous offerings, but didn't want to be a pill about it either.

So I guess we'll pay it forward. Somehow. For now, my girls think going to McDonald's is the best idea EVER and want to try every day to see if another kid is having a party.

*sigh*

Hangin In Possum Kingdom

So, if you are from Texas (particularly Northwest), you may know what Possum Kingdom is. If not, then it probably sounds pretty gross. Who wants to hang out with a bunch of possum? They all end up as roadkill anyway.



Or you may think the above even if you are Texan, like me.

Possum Kingdom, I found this summer, is an absolutely gorgeous lake surrounded by cliffs and rolling hillsides. There are possums, but only the sneaky ones who come in the night to dig up our aunt's beautiful lawn. She has one of the spectacular homes on the cliffs. To get to the dock, you are basically walking at a 30 degree angle down the cliff to a limestone rock lake. Quite a workout when you add a kid or two in your arms.




I give the wonderful description to say that NONE OF THAT MATTERS. I still got completely freaked out about the water. Lake water gives me the willies. (Did I mention Willie Nelson has a home on the cliffs too?) No matter, once my big toe dipped into the clear as a lake can be water, my heart started pounding and I swear a piranha or dead body was waiting for me in there.


However, my oldest child couldn't get enough of the lake. She flung herself in from the boat, from the dock, from the jetski. She even begged her dad to let her jump off the 15 foot high deck atop the dock. Eh, no.

Ava hated the boat. The wind. That dang life jacket. So she napped on the boat. The entire time!

But she was quite happy to be on dry land. Like her mama.

I thank you, Possum Kingdom, for showing us your beauty and allowing my Isabella to find her adventurous side. Ava may find it next year. Or she may be more like her mother than we already know.

Bella Moment at the lake's restaurant:

She was completely baffled why anyone would chop off a deer's head and hang it on the wall.

We fielded questions for an entire evening over it. Husband's solution? He told her that the deer was just so beautiful when it was alive that when the deer died, they hung it on the wall to show everyone its beauty. She accepted the answer but still didn't understand why the entire deer couldn't jut out from the wall.

Can we get a distraction over here, please?

From Fee To Fowa.

Best advice I've heard about parenting?

If you want to know how you are doing as a parent, listen to how your children speak to you and others.

So very true. While my girls have picked up a little drama from their mama (and Daddy!) they are also very loving, kind and funny.

Oh, and an older mom of 20-something girls told my husband that the hardest and most important ages for raising girls are 11 and 14. Interesting, dontcha think?

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Thursday was Bella's first day of preschool. It was a completely different scene than last year when she went to school.

We ran out of time for breakfast so there is her Cheerios in a cup. First bump in the road and all of that was on the floor. Good one, Mom.

This is Bella attempting to smile at the camera but being distracted by all her friends headed into the school. Naturally.

Did she cry? No way. In fact, she didn't even say goodbye to me! Many parents might have had their feelings hurt but I was thrilled that she was more excited to be there than sad to leave me.

Who did cry? Ava. She didn't like leaving her sister there one bit.

But she got over it rather quickly.

I really didn't do anything productive in that 5 1/2 hours Bella was in school. And at 2:15, all the mothers were lined up to pick up their big little people. One mom joked that by May, we'll all be scrambling to get there by 2:30. So true!

I'm cool with preschool. It is the big "K" of next year that makes my heart leap out of my throat and slap me.

Did your kids start school this week?

Toddler Tidbits

Bella, stretching out after a long nap: "Daddy, I need some lotion. My back is KILLING ME."


Some grownups need to keep their drama in check.



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Me, rocking Ava at 1:30am after she woke up howling and is now ready to play: "Baby, why aren't you sleepy?"


Ava: "Becuss."


Because. Did she warp speed to teen-speak in the wee hours?



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Bella with her ever present obsession with marriage: "Mommy, can I wear your wedding dress when I get married? And can I put roses on it to make it prettier?"


Sure, babe. You might also want to get it dry-cleaned or just cut the bottom half off since I never did. An outdoor wedding and a total (but awesome!) dive jazz cafe reception leave many memories on silk.

*I recently found out that my child isn't the only pining away for love. Her friend Paige, quite the tomboy I thought, has declared that Gavyn is her "true love". Gag away, my friends*

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This morning we were talking about Bella's friend, Rebecca, who broke her arm last week. I told Bella she'd need to be gentle with Rebecca while she healed.

Dr. Isabella said: "When everyone breaks their arm it doesn't hurt because their mommy puts a piece of paper around it and hangs it on their shoulder till they get bettah."

Yes, my little Texan has a bit of a Boston accent. For no reason at all.

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News From Down Under...

If your child has an inexplicably bright blue bowel movement, check the color sidewalk chalks for bite marks.

Wonder Girl

My children are so different. If you have more than one, I'm sure you can claim the same.

Bella is sweet, sensitive and princessy (read that to mean theatrical if you wish). Ava is Miss Jekyl and Hyde. I mean that in the most loving way, of course. She can go from a tender kissy moment to an ear-piercing "No!" with sparks of fire in her eyes faster than you can even think to blink.

I'm not sure what to do with this tiny screaming bundle of wonder. Naturally, Ava picks the best times to display her tonsils. The store. A friend's house. Anywhere that "inside voices" are preferred.

She's smart as a whip and SHE KNOWS IT. Singing her ABCD's as loud as she can with a triumphant smile when everyone around oooh's and ahhh's. She dresses and undresses herself faster than a tire change at a NASCAR race then exclaims, "I did it!" Ava knows how to draw circles and does so on everything. She tells everyone her name with great satisfaction. "I'm Aba Eeesabef!"

The girl isn't even two and already tells us "I do it mysef!"

I mean, come on!

The challenge before me? Helping this child use her abilities for good and not evil. I decided to not put her into school this year but realize now that I'll have to fill that time with things for her to do. When she's bored, she's a force to be reckoned with.

For all the itty bitty whirlwind that Ava is, her number one favorite person is still her big sister. She wants to be all that Bella is and more. Note the TWO crowns on her head...

We've All Heard It...

Kids and peanut butter can be dangerous.

Now I know another way.

Retro Superhero

After a day spent running around in superhero masks with Mitchell, Bella woke up this morning begging for one.

And here it is. She completed the outfit with the sparkly headband thingie. I think that's her superhero face, but I'm not sure.

I would like to thank State Farm for their contribution of the red and white brochure.

GDO

Saturday, my friends, was AWESOME.

One of my BFFs is turning 35 this week so she decided to have a Girl's Day Out to celebrate on Saturday. The day included my very first pedicure (sad, huh?) complete with Korean toe art.

Then we hung out at her pool all afternoon. Without children! We quickly adjusted, don't worry. Sipping sangria, reading gossip rags and talking (laughing) about how our husbands think all women talk about is sex. Then we got dressed up for dinner at the fabulous Mi Cocina followed by an eye-opening evening at a bar downtown.

It's funny because my husband and I, along with his entourage of friends, would hang out at this exact same bar about 5 years ago. The scene was so different from then! Or maybe I just am?

The band that played was called Phantom Five. They were obviously mid-lifers who'd watched one too many rock videos. The bass player was as Flea as he could be, but not. The lead singer would tuck his imaginary rocker hair behind his ears. And I swear he was wearing the exact same Cowboys t-shirt that my husband owns as a pajama set.

The highlight was the 40-something drunk woman who would dance like it was 1999 in front of the stage, only to trip on a crack in the concrete and pop back up to keep twirling.

Heeeelarious.

Being there with 3 other married moms, we all agreed that we are definitely happy where we are in life.

The long, wonderful day ended for me at about 10:30pm. Twelve hours away from my beloveds was more than enough and I felt rejuvenated, ready to resume my happy reality.

Four women who didn't know each other very well at 10:30am but were best buds by 10:30pm.

Now that is an awesome GDO, right?