Wiggin Out

Ava's 4 month checkup was on Friday. The usual. Strip her down, weight check, eyebrow raised at thunder thighs (hers, not mine...I think), height measurement, gasps from doctor on future NBA player, screams from shots and then the silence of breastfeeding.

Ava is 13 lbs, 14 oz. Just 9 oz more than Bella was at 4 months, which surprises the heck out of me. But even more suprising is that Ava is 26 3/4 " long and Bella was 24" long at 4 months. It never ceases to amaze just how different siblings are from the beginning!

Now on to even more important things.

Which 'do will do?

An Amazing, Exciting and Lovely Time

She called this a "rain down".

Logical, don't you think?

Forgot her shoes. Had to make do.

Bella loves talking. And talking. But it is at such a high decible, I think my dad doesn't even hear her sometimes.

She also loves adjectives. And is learning to use them correctly!

We went to see my family this weekend. My parents, sister, BIL, nephew, brother, and his GF.

Dad became Bella's new best friend with his gumball machine. He'd give her a penny for a gumball and she'd chew it for about 3 seconds, spitting it out as instructed (the concept of gum still pretty much eludes her) and would immediately ask Grandpa for another "doin". Yes, that is "coin" with a "d". Watching Dad try to figure out that one was funny.

All weekend, everything was "amasing" and "essiting". She told my mom that the peaches in the fruit bowl were "lofely".

What 2 1/2 year old says "lovely"??

Climbing awkwardly out of little cousin Dillon's toy house, she exclaimed "Its a WONNERFUL day!"

My sister just likes to hear her talk. I'm very glad someone other than me thinks everything Bella says is adorable. That is, except when she screeches "Noooooooo!". That is not adorable on any level. Even when she's got teensy-tiny pigtails I've managed to stretch up into rubber bands. Instant face-lift for a toddler.

We had a great weekend and I already miss everyone. How was your weekend?

And WHY would I want my toes in my face, Mama?

Could he BE any cuter?

Life Is Like A Box of Chocolate, Alot Of It Is Nuts...Or Maybe Just Me

Three Faces of Eve posted some interesting facts about herself. I love reading about you all so I thought maybe you might want to know a bit more about me. Hey, I understand if you don't.

Over the years, I've learned to see the humor in my life and poke fun at myself. I wouldn't change anything about my life or my past as it is all one big adventure with lessons throughout.


1) Being the undisciplined college student that I was, I only attended the art classes. Even with A's, that isn't going to do much for the ol' GPA when you don't show up for anything else.

2) Amazingly, some people thought my talent enough to teach their children art lessons for two years. That was fun and inspiring. Though not inspiring enough to return to school.

3) Met my husband at the horse track. It was the first time I'd ever been and he was standing next to me as the horse we'd both bet on won the race. I high-fived the stranger and married him 3 years later.

4) I hiked the Grand Canyon from North Rim to South Rim in just over 2 days. I had never hiked or camped prior to this. I lost four toenails which, I'm told, have been permanently "traumatized". It was the worst and the most incredible experience ever. By the end of the 26 mile hike, I was in tears and a day hiker asked if I was alright. I sobbed and begged that she tell her children to "keep to the right" of the trail instead of barreling down past exhausted uphill hikers. I'm pretty sure she was concerned for my mental state as well as physical.

5) Having not learned anything, I skiied for the first time on my honeymoon in Whistler, Canada. CRAZY. That sums it up. Took me 2 1/2 hours to get down the mountain. By the end of it, I was cursing so loud I'm pretty sure the school of 9 yr olds zipping past me picked up a few new words. I blame my husband for thinking the girl in powder blue excelling in ski school was me and encouraging me to skip the rest of class to ski with him. I was actually the one in powder blue barely mastering the snow plow.

6) Third time's the charm for stupidity, I guess. When 4 months pregnant with Bella, we went to Mexico as we do every year, but for some ungodly reason, we decided we were bored of just relaxing on the beach with waiters to serve us. So we rode 1950's banana seat bicycles through the jungles of Coba. It was so bumpy, I couldn't sit on the seat and I had to stand on the pedals to ride. I spent the entire next day sick, in Mexico, and my husband frantically called my doctor in the states asking for help. Can you imagine the conversation the nurses had over that call?

7) I have never ridden a rollercoaster and never will.

8) I'm afraid of exiting dark rooms. I will pretty much leap or run from the dark room to one that has light. I'll do the same when leaving the dark outside to the lighted indoors. I try to keep the heebie jeebies to a minimum around others.

9) I've been married before and thought for sure I would be punished for getting a divorce by never bearing children. So much for that ridiculous notion. I've been blessed beyond measure with two beautiful, healthy girls.

10) I love to drink sweet tea with milk. My brother and sister do as well. But they drink tea with about 1/4 tsp milk. Not sure that really counts.

11) I have an obsessision with my childrens' nostrils and ears. If there is anything there, I gotta remove it. It appears that I've passed that obsession on to Bella. The other day she was caught with her finger up Ava's nose.

12) Sometimes when nursing Ava in the middle of the night, I think of things I could blog about. Then I completely forget what it was by morning.

Yeah, so I'm ending the list at 12.

Tell me something kooky about you so I feel better about myself. K? What good friends you are!

Look At That Goat, Honey!

We are so City. If there was ever a question before, it has been answered as of yesterday.

We went to the livestock and equestrian show. Our city has one of the largest stock shows in the U.S. and we've gone every year that we've been together. The first few years, I think we fit in pretty good. Even went to the rodeo without looking too deer in the headlights. I yee-hawed with the best of 'em.

This year we loaded up the double stroller, the Snugli (aka the Life Saver), the diaper bag, our two children and us. I opted against Bella's faux fur sweater set that just screamed Gymboree, and instead she wore jeans and a hoodie.

We wandered around aimlessly, Bella's excitement building for the animals she was supposed to see. The first animal? A horse. Walking away. So she got to see a horse's butt up close. I just prayed that was all she'd see at that moment.

I don't know WHY but it took a good hour, 3 corn dogs, a bag of caramel popcorn and a greasy ham n' cheese sandwich for us to decide we needed a map. Bella had yet to see anything other than the equestrian behind and her humor was leaving the premises. Oh, we could hear the swine, the chickens, the cows and the goats, but had yet to find them among all the barns and auction houses with high stalls.

FINALLY, we found what we were looking for. The children's barnyard. Newly hatched baby chicks, ducklings, calfs, bunnies (only the cutest EVER!), miniature horses, piglets, and a turkey the gobbled and made the city kids scream with delighted fear while the country kids looked confused at such a response.

Bella took a cute picture with four precious baby goats. She was too enamored to look at the photographer so the girl started yelling Bella's name to get her attention. "ISABELLA! LOOK AT THE CAMERA! ISSSSSSABELLLLLLLLAAA!" Whatever. Bella was way more into this fuzzy little creature laying on her lap. That polaroid was $7.50.

Afterwards, she took an adorable picture on a miniature horse. Pink cowgirl hat, chaps, bandana and huge smile. She threw a fit when she had to get off her new toy.

Then said she needed a picture with the chickens. Fortunately, there was no booth for that.

Three hours and well over $100 later, I was carrying Bella, Ava was in the Snugli on my husband and the stroller was strewn with goodies and crumbs. It was time to go home.

On our way out, we're walking by the area the animals use to exercise.

I exclaim, "Bella! Look at the goat, honey! Isn't it so cute?!"

It baa's at me.

Oh. It is a shorn sheep.

I may as well have offered up some hot sauce from NEW YORK CITY! for the looks I got.

The country folks rolled their eyes, a few chuckles were heard and my husband laughed hysterically. (hey, mister, I didn't see you pipe in that it was a sheep!)

Next year, I will at least know the difference between a goat and a naked sheep. I just hope Bella continues to not take notice of the huge difference between a bull and a cow. And I do mean huge.

A Tale Of Four Kitchens

This year we decided to get Bella a play kitchen. I'm all for women's lib but also understand that little girls looooooove to pretend they are domestic goddesses.

I didn't want to spend alot on a kitchen since it wasn't to be the focal point of her room. I also bought her an art easel and her dad bought an adorable writing desk & chair. We have high expectations.

I found a kitchen on sale for $30. It was a steal as it was regular price $60. How could I not? I ordered it and received a box of 150 million pieces of plastic all stuck together awaiting an evening of cursing and ARGH!-ing to put it together.

My husband's aunt ordered a kitchen for their granddaughter, who they are raising. She bought the fancy schmancy expensive one. It was delivered to our house since she and her husband work.

Then she figured out that the store over-charged them and so the store...sent them another one. To our house. So now I had three play kitchens at my house. Why? Because they insisted my aunt had to take her first one back to the store for a refund because she paid by check, blah blah blah.

After comparing apples to carcass, I decided to buy the schmancy kitchen from the aunt and give the crappy one to his grandmother so all the grandkids could play and destroy without anyone feeling bad.

Problem?

El' Crapo was missing parts. Are you kidding me?

I contacted the store, they said they'd send the parts.

What did I receive? Oh yeah! ANOTHER KITCHEN.

I have never, nor do I ever want again, four plastic kitchens in my home. Try explaining to a 2 1/2 yr old that you are basically a plastics warehouse and she only gets to keep one. How very Mommy Dearest.

The tickle-your-funny-bone-or-not part? The original store told me to keep Crappy Kitchen #2 for free. HA! All that means is that I have two turds and one is still missing pieces! That will be donated. Don't feel bad for the kid who gets it, SHE can have HER mommy call for the missing sink.

As for Bella, she's happy as can be with the expensive kitchen. Go figure. And when I asked if she could make me some tea?

"Uh-oh...I'm fesh out, Mama."

*sigh*

A Noisy Village

I'm sure you moms have all heard the phrase "It takes a village to raise a child". It should really be more like "It takes a village to talk about how you raise your child".

People, specifically family, spend 90% of their time visiting with you assessing your child. Have you noticed? Especially infants. I guess because they can't pipe in to defend themselves.

Why is the baby crying?

She sounds like she's in pain. Did you give her the maximun 12 doses of Mylicon yet?

Have you tried giving her cereal? Can I give her some? I just happen to have a box of baby cereal in my purse.

Is her ear deformed? Why don't you duct tape it to her head?

She certainly is fat. Are those thigh tires a good thing?

Oh, there she goes spitting up again. Does she need some medicine? What does her doctor say about all that spewing? It sure is rank. No thanks, you can hold her.

She just blew out a diaper. That's why she was crying. Perhaps you should change what you eat so she won't be so miserable.

Does she always scream when she's unhappy? Is it gas?

Isabella was never like that. She's always been so docile and sweet. (This just baffles me since Bella didn't like anyone or anything the first 6 months of her life. Everyone thought she was Satan's sister)


And the best one...


You shouldn't hold your baby so much. It will spoil her.


SERIOUSLY?

It wears a person out completely. A mother shouldn't have to spend so much time defending herself or her children! It is no wonder that so many moms look wild-eyed and exhausted. It isn't necessarily from their babies...it is from everyone constantly evaluating their skills as a parent or their kid's lack of perfection (ie. seen and not heard).

Other than that, we had a fabulous weekend. How about you? :)

Snow, Ya'll!

Well, lookit that.

Snow.

In Texas.

Keep tryin, honey...

I think red plaid and pastels look lovely together, don't you?

(There IS a fire amongst all that ash. Really)

Bella shares her fashion tips with Ava.

Careful What You Ask For

Because my daughter is hilarious to me, another Bella Tidbit:

Last night after a long, luxurious shower (a rarity), I was at my make-up table applying my nightly moisturizer with Bella next to me, rummaging through the make-up drawer. She found a necklace and decided to try and hang it on my boob.

When that didn't work, she decided to examine the boob closer and poked it as if it might be playing possum.

We talked about how Ava gets baby milk and she drinks big girl milk. Then she asked where the milk was. So I showed her how it works with a little squeeze, a stream of milk hitting the counter.



Bella stared for a moment.




"Ima go see what Daddy's doin"




HA.

What A Sucker!

So one of our New Year resolutions is to get Bella potty trained before preschool starts in August. At least enough where she can tell the teacher she needs to go potty and will keep her pull-up dry, for the most part.



Yesterday, I told Bella that she needed to potty on the big-girl potty because we were almost out of Dora pull-ups. It is true, I wasn't lying!



Then...I said she'd get a reward after. Her eyes got huge with excitement and she ran to the potty, yanked her pants down and peed with lightning speed.



After much praise and hand clapping, I cleaned her up, she washed her hands and immediately requested her reward. So I gave her a dum-dum sucker.



She peed 4 times yesterday. That means FOUR SUCKERS.



Each time she would go, pulling her own pants down and sort of pulling them back up (getting it over the hiney seems to be a challenge) then promptly asked for her reward. At first I thought she was fibbing when she'd come running into the room announcing what a big girl she is on the potty. Isn't that awful? But sure enough, a freshly filled potty tray awaited me.



Hmmm.



At this rate, we'll be visiting the dentist within a month trying to explain decay and chipped teeth. We'll also have to spend a small fortune stocking up on toilet paper for the half-roll she wads and dabs with after each session.



This morning, I asked if she needed to use the potty. She said no so I figured yesterday was just a freak day. I changed her droopy night diaper and put fresh clothes on her.



I barely had her pants pulled up before she tore off to the bathroom, yanked down her pants, peed, asked if I was "poud of hu" (yes, she's into talking 3rd person lately) and demanded a sucker.



Uh-oh.

Save A Jigger For Me

This is totally random but I have to share this EASY and delicious recipe for all you busy working and stay-at-home moms....or you who are lazy and hungry.

Every week I buy a roasted chicken in the deli section. The key is to de-bone it immediately because it is less nasty than when the chicken is cold.

One of the things I make weekly (we're pitiful that way) is a vodka penne pasta. Hey, somebody's gotta drink the Absolute.

All you need:

1 jar marinara or the tub of it in the refrigerated section at the store (Buitoni?)
1/2 can petite diced tomatoes
1 cup chopped fresh mushrooms (more or less or none, as you prefer)
1 cup shredded roast chicken
1/3 cup Vodka
Cooked penne pasta


I like to sautee the mushrooms in olive oil first. Then add the sauce and diced tomatoes into same pan. Throw in chicken and add the vodka. Let it simmer for about 15 minutes on low.

Toss the sauce with the penne pasta or serve on top of the penne.

Enjoy!

My child LOVES this dish. Maybe because she thinks she's getting some alcohol while a minor.

I'm not much of a cook but when I find an easy recipe that the whole family will eat, we run with it.

WHAAAAAAAASSS UUUUUUUP

Have you seen the new Bud Light commercials and billboards?

"It's always worth it."

IS IT? Really?

Is it worth wrapping your tree around a pole? Is it worth playing hopskotch in a straight line while touching your nose as an officer requests backup?

It has to be the most irresponsible and stupid ad slogan in years.

However, Geico has GREAT commericals. I love mocking Neanderthals.

Ooops...I did it again...

Well, Ava rolled off the couch this morning.

There goes my Mother of the Year nomination...again.

Who's That Girl?

Here's proof that Ava has good days.

Did you ever notice you have far more pics with your children posing with everyone but you?

I got creative. If you have a digital camera, you can take a self-portrait if you take the pic with the view window on the camera reflecting in the bathroom mirror. Oh yeah. Total geek move.

Ava had fun. For at least five minutes. Think I'll try this technique with both girls.

Whatever Works...Right?

NOTE: Before calling CPS, no baby was injured or drugged during this photo shoot.

She fell asleep chomping on Daddy's finger. She awoke for 1/2 second to lip tremble, then promptly fell back asleep. This is normal for our child.

No Rest For The Weary

I beg of you...help me help her.

With Isabella, we co-slept until she was about 13 months old, then she started sleeping on her own. Then I got pregnant when she was 18 months old and she started sleeping with me again so that I could sleep because I felt SO AWFUL the first 4 months of pregnancy. We're pretty much back to square one with her co-sleeping again. It is fine because she does sleep the whole night and is fun to cuddle with. But that is New Year's Resolution #2, to get her back into the big girl bed.


Ava, on the other hand, is not so fun. Up until Christmas traveling, she would co-sleep with me and wake just once a night to nurse. It was great. After Christmas traveling? Not so great. She's now in a cycle of wanting to nurse to sleep, every couple of hours. And she's not even hungry! She just nurses on top of nursing, causing her to spew. It is gross and frustrating.

SO...


I'm gathering advice/suggestions for any mom who's baby breastfed or currently breastfeeds.

What did you do to encourage sleeping through the night?

Did you allow any crying? How long? I do not believe in cry-it-out but I know that a little crying is not harmful emotionally or physically.

Did it take several days or weeks to teach your baby to sleep on his/her own?

Ava refuses a pacifier and will suck her thumb usually, but not always. Once she gets ticked off (ie. total red face furious) then calming her down takes forever.

I am just as clueless with baby #2 as I was baby #1! *sigh*

Can't tape the thumb in, I know

This is what lack of sleep does to a girl

Just call her Dazey

Mixed Messages

Bella: "Mama, I am soooo anry!"

Me: You're angry? Why?

Bella: "Becus you my BES FRIEND!"



Later that same day...


Bella: * sighs*

Me: What is it, honey?

Bella: "Ahmstar fintodet"

Me: Excuse me?

She dramatically throws herself against the pillows on the couch.

Bella: "Ahmstar fintodet"

Me: Okay. Seriously. What ARE you saying?

Bella, exasperated: "I AM STARFIN TO DET!"

Me: You are starving to death?


She giggles and pretends to go to sleep.

Peace On Earth

Peace has finally been restored in my home and I have gradually returned to half sane.


Entertainment News:

Ava laughed yesterday!

I was laughing and then she did which totally surprised her and she looked startled. So I fake laughed to see if she'd laugh again, that's when she just stared at me as if we'd just met.


On The Potty Front:

New pretty princess panties did nothing for Bella's interest in potty training. She put them on, then grabbed around, squinching her nose and asked, disgusted, "Is that my hiney?".

Needless to say, the pretty princess pull-ups made their way back on and the panties joined the Dora panties in the darkness of a drawer. Surely my child will start using the potty by jr. high. Right?


DIY:

We've been trying to sell my MIL's house for months. Decided to actually put money into it now instead of half-assing it, because apparently people don't like that. What exactly is the difference between ceiling paint and wall? Is that a gimmick? Cuz we've totally bought into it.


Classifieds:

Over Christmas, my husband campaigned hard for my brother to take our dog, Sophie. She's lovely, sweet, huge and too much dog for us. I guess since one dog died, we're evaluating our current pet population and trying to downsize. The cats will just eventually explode from over-eating. Ever see the pictures of what a healthy cat and an obese cat look like? Ours need lapbands. Zeus, the crippled weiner, requires a diaper. He just walks around, pooping without knowing, then looks back in surprise at the stinky pile he'd dropped off.

I'd always heard I'd love my animals until I had children. I still love my animals but I'd love them more if someone else would love them at THEIR house.


Politics:

So much to say but I don't discuss politics. Or religion. Unless it is on someone else's blog.



Hope you all have a fantastic Friday! Any New Year's plans? Any resolutions that you may actually stick to?

Happy Hollerdays!

Oh. Wow.

Why didn't anyone stop me? Where was the motherly advice slash warning?

I took a 2 1/2 yr old and a 2 1/2 month old on a five day travel nightmare. WHY?!

Because it was Christmas. Because some family had yet to meet Ava. Because there was food someone else prepared. Because it was supposed to relax me for others to look after my children!

So much for that.

Instead, my oldest had meltdown after meltdown. Her grandparents bought a new two-story, beautiful home. Did Bella care? No. It was NOT the same house she's known all her life. Grandma's hobby room was gone. The sunroom...gone. All the knooks and cranies Bella had become accustomed to were gone. Why was everyone so dang excited about this new building she knew nothing about??

Then her cousin. Dear sweet Dillon now WALKS and nobody asked Bella's permission! Because he walks, he can swipe toys from her just as easily as she can swipe from him. No fair!

And my precious Ava.

If no one sees me in public for the next three months, it is because of her.

I apparently cursed myself by labeling Ava early on as my laid-back, gentle soul. Naw. She was just gearing up for Christmas! She is just as sensitive to over-stimulation as Bella was, but more VOCAL. For five days.

And since we did not have enough fun with that, we decided to squeeze in day six of Christmas last night. I had to eat in the kitchen with the children because Ava wouldn't stop yelling. One of my husband's lovely aunts drove over an hour just to see our little angel. I do not expect she'll be driving an hour anymore for the same.

If one more person tells me to give Ava cereal to shut her up, I will scream silently.

OH! And add nearly five days of no pooping on Ava's hit-list. You can add the "s" if you like. So we had that going for us...which is nice.

I'm tired, cranky and stinky. So I'm going to put my children down for a nap, leap into the shower and back out, then enjoy the silence. Or just read your blog.

Mewy Chrisamis

Poor Bella. She just got the hang of "Happy Halloween" and now she's gotta learn not only "Happy Holidays" but "Merry Christmas" too! Tough life. I tried to teach her "Santa's Coming to Town" and it ended up:

Beer wash out
Beer naw kwy
Sanna Caws is a le-el lamb
le-el lamb, le-el lamb
His fees is why is snoooow.

And then she bows deeply, saying "Thaaaaaaaaaank you, thaaaaaaaaaank you"

I kid you not.

We wish you all a wonderful Christmas full of joy, good food and happy memories. After the holidays, be sure to share your stories because we'll certainly share ours! :)

Miss Understood

See this baby? So calm. Relaxed.

She just hangs out, watches her sister, drools on herself quietly.

I'm not sure who's baby went shopping with me this weekend.

I attempted to Christmas shop three times. And each time, within 10 minutes of arriving, that cute, adorable baby burst into blood-curdling screams. Turned red with anger at being there. Stiffened her legs in defiance. Tried sucking her thumb as if her life depended on it, only to have her thumb not cooperate and in turn causing more ear piercing unhappiness.

I learned a few things this weekend.

1) Do not ever assume that just because a mother has a 3 month old child with her that it is her only child. She may very well NOT be a new mother in desperate need of your unsolicited advice.

Example: A woman pointed out from across the aisle that my baby was upset. I ignored her. She came over to me so I wouldn't miss out on what she had to say and suggested that I feed my screaming banshee. I don't think I was very sweet in my reply that she isn't my first child and I know what is wrong with her.

2) Do not strike up a conversation about one of Oprah's shows with a mother holding an unhappy baby.

Example: A woman thought a recent episode on Oprah about secret baby languages was "funny" and did I watch it to know what my baby needed?

3) Store checkouts are magical. As soon as you get in line, your frantic infant will burst into smiles and cooing. All who are around her will think she's an angel from heaven and you will be showered with praise.

4) After a shopping experience, put your drama queen in her car seat and she'll give you a smile that says it all.

She won. Again.

'Tis The Season

Nothing quite like children to really bring forth the spirit of the holidays.

Friday we picked up my husband from his office to go Christmas shop and see Santa. Isabella had never seen Santa in person and I'm not the type to force something on her like have her sit on some furry man's lap if she's not all for it. We decided to go see Santa's story time so she could take a gander at him.

Bella was very excited when a tall, rolly-polly man with white hair and beard (Amanda says natural Santa beards look peed on...'tis true) came onto the little stage ringing sleigh bells. But as the story began, she became far more interested in the shiny, slick floor. She began to body mop, sliding here and there and into everyone within reach. Fortunately, she's cute.

(Yes, that is my child sprawled out)

Twenty long minutes later, Santa wrapped it up *snort* and we asked Bella what she thought of him. After tapping the side of her mouth with her finger while in thought, she decided she likes him. We took her to where he was taking pictures and let her watch other kids get their pics. She got excited at the idea and we picked a number (great idea, mall people) for our turn.


A grandmother was taking pictures of her 7 grandkids and it was humorous to watch her corral them. She finally got them all lined up and ready to click, then who appears at the end of the line, poised and ready? My daughter. As I coaxed her away, she had big tears rolling down her cheeks as she tried to explain that she was just trying to help!


She did very well with Santa who was sweet and kind to her. He held her tiny hand in his wrinkly old one and spoke quietly to her. She smiled on cue for the camera and her eyes lit up when Santa asked if she'd like toys for Christmas. It was a very sweet moment and I'm glad they let us use our own cameras. She had a difficult time saying goodbye to her new friend, but got over it once she found the tree-shaped sucker in the goody bag from Santa's elf.

Bella was completely exhausted at the end of our little adventure. She'd given money to the Salvation Army, she'd watched the quartet play "Jingle Bells", she shared a cup of hot cocoa with her mama and talked endlessly about Santa Clause.

I used to think it was a silly tradition we Americans have, the commercialism of Santa and all..but after this weekend, I see how sweet and uplifting it can be.

I Must've Been Tired

While changing a diaper, I was about to say the usual "Hiney up!" so I could get a little help with the up-and-over when I looked down and saw that I was putting a huge pull-up diaper on my 2 1/2 month old.

Gonna be a looong day.

Dirty Tricks

Have you noticed that if you've not switched to Blogger Beta, then you cannot post other than Anonymous?

So, what started off as a nice enough invitation to experience the new Blogger Beta is now a do or don't post.

Forcing the hand, don't ya think?

My Name Is... My Name Is...

This weekend I got to hang out with some adults. It was great! Except I realized that I have no social skills anymore.

I'm lucky to get it out that my name is Jennifer without stumbling over my words. What's up with that? Is it because I've spent the last year using one to four word sentences, repeatedly?

It was my husband's office party. At the millionaire boss's house. And then that millionaire's zillionaire boss came by. I had NO IDEA who the man was. All I know is that people whispered "Mr. McIntyre is here!" and I thought, wow, he must be well-liked. Then this short man with bad teeth and a very expensive suit came to greet us, pretty much asking who the hell my husband is.

They've actually met once before, about two weeks after my husband started with the company, which was Sept 05. He asked my husband at that time how much he'd sold, my husband laughed and said "nothing yet!" and the zillionaire walked away. Well, my husband has had a great '06 and once he realized it, Mr. M was all friendly, smiley and hand-shakey. His little wife with big Dallas hair was just as pleased as punch to meet us. She was very sweet and kept talking to us long after Mr. M dismissed us from his presence.

So the whole night, if anyone even mentioned my children, they got stuck with toddler and infant stories. The whole time I'm going on about Ava's coos and Bella's adventures as a Wonder Pet, my inner voice is screaming at me to shut up. But my inner mother apparently just put it in time-out cuz I kept blabbing on.

This weekend is a smaller office party, without anyone who has money worth mentioning. I'm trying to learn how to better conduct myself. Any suggestions?

Like:

How do you walk away from a conversation that's dwindled to both people quietly seeking an exit from it?

How do you keep from glazing over when they're all discussing the big client they just bagged?

Where do you put your used plate? Do you put the fork on it? Do you hang on to your drink glass or can I permanent marker my name on it?

HELP ME!

Gimme A Break!

This past week has been busy busy. I don't know why I get so excited about the holidays because all it does is stress me out. I've yet to go Christmas shopping. Isn't that pitiful?

Well, that's not exactly true...I did buy Bella's gifts online and they are sitting in huge boxes in the foyer. That's the extent of the shopping though and I've got quite a long list to check off! Like everyone's really been that nice this year. Pshaw.

Bella and her BFF Mitchell decorated cookies this week. That was interesting. Mitchell overloaded everything with sprinkles and I had a hard time convincing Bella to put icing on the cookie and not just in her mouth. Lucky family members will be receiving some lovely creations in their stockings.

Then we attempted Christmas pictures. With one kid, you can take about 75 pictures and maybe get one or two good ones. With two kids? Fuggitaboutit.

As much fun as this is, can I go watch Little Bear now?

Is is possible to give a sweet choke hold?

Seriously, Mom, I am so over the picture taking.

It looks like I'll be using a great picture Amanda took of the girls several weeks back. I was getting far too worked up over a Christmas picture to send out in cards. Does anyone really care if they are perfectly posed? Nah.

Then there is Ava's obsession. The moment she's awake, she has an ongoing fight with her thumb. Ava has refused any pacifier since birth. Hates them. Throws a fit like you wouldn't believe a 2 month old could be capable of.

Instead, since day one of owning a thumb, she's tried to suck it. She's even trying to suck it in the sonogram picture. I tried to discourage it up until three days ago. Now I'm propping up her arm, spreading her fingers out to help her get the Hook'm Nose and cheering her on when she FINALLY gets it going for two minutes.

She'll suck long enough to fall asleep, then smack on it so loud that she startles herself awake, yelling and turning blood red with anger and frustration. My darling angel has a temper. Yay.

How has your week been?

For Half Their Life Already...

This is Bella and her best friend, Mitchell, at the zoo in October '05.

This is Bella and Mitchell, October of this year.

Who needs a zoo for entertainment now?

There are two monkeys right in my own home!

Say AHHHHHHHH

Doesn't she look as though she takes dental hygiene very seriously?

Don't let it fool ya. She just likes to eat the toothpaste off the rotating brush

and let it fling leftover toothpaste and saliva everywhere.

However, it is on my husband's side of the bathroom so he never notices.

Perfecting Time Out

K..anyone interested, my sister emailed this wonderful advice based on years of behaviour management classes and personal experience with her preschool students. Thanks, Amanda!

For time-out to be effective it has to be:

a) Away from positive stimulation (boring, but not painful at all!)
b) Enforced (she has to be made to stay)
c) Predictable (a set length of time, usually 1 minute per year of age. Longer than that is pointless considering their attention span.)

Ideally, if you were teaching a child behavior guidelines, when they crossed the guideline, you would say "Don't do that again, or you will be in time-out."

All children do it again, cause they want to test you. Immediately remove them from the situation and place them in their time-out area (carpet square, chair) and tell them they have to be in time out for X minutes.

Walk away.

If they scream, ignore them.

If they don't stay in the time-out area, put them back ("stay here") and start the timer over.

If they still don't stay, hold them there. They will struggle but do not speak to them, lecture, or make eye contact.

After the appropriate amount of time, take them away from the time-out area and have a SHORT discussion about what happened.

The next time they test their boundaries, they will have a good recollection about what "Time Out" is. It will be an unpleasant memory, and they might (maybe) think twice about misbehaving.

Also, counting is a no-no! Don't ever say "Get overhere right now! one.... two.... I mean it!...." etc. That is not only ineffective but it shows the child that they have until you get to 3, and that just prolongs their compliance.

She also says that Time Out often doesn't work because it isn't done correctly.

Next Issue?

Parenting Gone Awry

Isabella is pretty much a good girl. However, she's now a pretty much good girl who's two years old. That presents some problems for when she's not-so-much a good girl and is testing her boundaries and ours.

My husband has, up until recently, been able to discipline Bella with The Look. My Dad calls that look "The Evil Eye" and it always worked on us as kids.

Bella's learned the art of ignoring her parents or anyone else trying to tell her what to do. She'll just zone out, turn off her ears or simply keep doing what she's doing.

Last night as I was nursing Ava, Bella plopped down beside me on the couch (after standing on it which is no-no #1) and began to kick at me with both feet. It didn't hurt but was obviously not meant in a loving way. My husband told her to stop. She didn't. He sent her to her room. She giggled and ran as if he was chasing her. He told her to stay there until she could behave.

She came out moments later with some toys. He asked if she was going to behave. She said no. So he sent her back to her room. This time she practically skipped with glee to her punishment.

She returned a nano-second later with her babydoll. This time I asked if she was going to be a good girl. She said yes. Then she ran over to the couch, climbed up next to me and proceeded to kick me again. My husband gave his best Look. She returned that look with one of defiance, still kicking, and yelled "I want to go to my room!". She lept off the couch, ran to her room and I glanced at my husband who just sat and blinked.

I could not help laughing (You know, the parental look away laugh). So even today my husband is perplexed. I pointed out that perhaps sending her to her favorite place to play isn't a good punishment. We may try the Time Out method. I think she's too young to write 500 sentences.

Any effective disciplinary actions you can share with me that don't involve spanking? I'm all ears.

My, How Times Have Changed.

Gone are the days when we'd gather with family for the holidays and just hang out all lazy and full from gorging ourselves throughout the month+ of celebrating. The holiday naps as football games blares on the TV until someone gets irritated enough to yell at the boys to turn it down.

Now our holidays consist of entertaining little people or at least keeping a watchful eye every second as they entertain themselves. Constantly asking, "Where's child ______ and who's watching him/her?" Then when a wail comes from somewhere out of sight, the women make a mad dash to see what's going on while the men yell from their post, "Hey! What's going on in there? Cut that out!" (standard Man Yell without knowing any facts, apparently)

Eating is a circus of getting plates of food ready for the little people, making sure each has exactly what the other has, finding those little people so they can eat, making sure no one touches anyone else, that they all have a utensil of some kind (not that they'll use it) and a drink. Thus begins the search for sippy cups. That is never ending. Or the grabbing of Sippy Cup A from Kid B while Kid C goes for Kid B's cup. Doesn't matter that all the cups look completely different. It is always more appealing to drink someone else's juice rather than your own, right?

Naps are ridiculous as well. Coordinating the little people to nap in a small house with too few beds never works without many tears and the probability of no nap for most.

Just as the big people crumble in a heap of exhaustion wherever their butt can sit, they peer out the window and see a wonderful, blessed sight. Their sweet, adorable little ones squealing, running, gleefully tossing autumn leaves into the air and laughing hysterically when the leaves stick to hair, clothing or the freaked out elderly dog. That's really what the holidays should be all about. Enjoying the moment.

I like how times have changed.

Who's Your Daddy? Or Mommy?

When you marry, before the ink is even dry on the marriage certificate, you are asked when you'll have kids. When pregnant, you're asked how many more babies you'd like to have. When your newborn is less than one hour old, you're asked when you'll try for the next child.

And apparently from day one that any of your children are born, it is commented who that baby looks like. Now we all know that a newborn doesn't look like anyone in particular right out of the chute (no pun intended) but people start the guessing game right away.

What's funny about our children is that they look like, well, us. My husband and I looked strikingly similar as babies. If I had the pics on the computer, I'd upload them to show you. It is almost too weird how we can barely figure out who is who.

Our daughters are a blend of both of us. But to some people, Isabella looks exactly like my husband. To others, she looks exactly like me. In photos, she looks exactly like my mother as a child.

Note that "exactly" is used each time. Because everyone is emphatic about who she looks like! And we hear it...all...the...time. From family. Friends. Old ladies. Check-out clerks. Random people in the elevator.

Now everyone tries their hardest to figure out who Ava looks like. Most say she looks like me. Some say my mother-in-law. (Yeah, makes no sense, does it?) Pictures of Bella as a fat baby (she was a chubster now that I look back) compared to Ava, they are hard to tell apart.

What is it about us that we want so much for our offspring to resemble us? Is it basic human nature? Some primal instinct to identify what is ours? Or is it arrogance? Selfishness?

I personally love that my girls resemble their dad. I love their daddy and seeing our babies with so many of his traits makes me very happy. Now, I may not love it if they try to break their nose three times so it'll look like his. Or if they one day exhibit an inability to ask for directions. But as long as I can teach them the concept of a laundry hamper, as I've failed to do with their dad, then we're good to go.

Survey Says...

Oh, yipee... all you who are brave enough, you get to talk about birth control!

I just went to my 6 week checkup (granted, it is week 7) and the doc said my c-section "zipper" looks great. Funny guy.

I didn't opt for tubal ligation because of the slimmest of slim possibilities I might want another baby. You just really never know what life will throw your way. So I need birth control of some sort. I really don't want any more surprises...

Anyway, I am nursing and though it gives some protection from pregnancy at least the first few months that I exclusively breastfeed, I know that I need backup.

Number one option is called the Mini-Pill. I used that when nursing Bella but it cut down my milk quite a bit.

Number two option is what my doc recommends but I have reservations. It is a particular IUD called the Marina and it works for 5 years. It has the greatest success rate in protection against pregnancy, but one in 1,000 patients will get pregnant and the chance of a fertilized egg in the fallopian tube is increased slightly. That would result in a miscarriage or an abortion, both which horrify me. But any birth control carries risk, in all reality.

So today, ladies, I would like your humble opinions on the matter of birth control. Have you tried the IUD? Is there a particular kind of pill you prefer? What have been the upsides or downsides to what you've used? Once I stop nursing, I will most likely get on a stronger dosage pill. I do have worries about taking any pill for an extended period *snort* of time, but it is the safest option I know of without a procedure for hubby that he'd have to be drugged, knocked out and dragged to. I don't think I could forge his name with his limp hand on the paperwork without someone noticing.

Discuss amongst yourselves...

Sister Love

Doctor's Orders?

Perhaps Daddy should follow the recommendation of

An Apple A Day...

Or Bella's

Nibble On Every Apple In One Day...

The Doctor Is In

My hubby gave me a scare last night. His blood pressure sky-rocketed and his face got all blotchy. We called his mother, who is a retired nurse, and like every other nurse on the friggin planet, she said we needed to go to the ER. C'mon! Where's the sage advice? Where's the do-this-so-you-don't-have-to-pay-out-the-ummm-nose help?

ANYWAY...

Bella, being the concerned intern that she is, patted her daddy sweetly and told him he'd be okay after checking him out.

When he started feeling better, I made him swear to go to the doctor for a check-up. Being a man, he said he was fine and didn't need a stinkin doctor. I growled and gave him The Look.

Then Bella asked if he had to go to the doctor.

He looked at me, defeated, and mumbled something resembling a "yes".

Bella's eyes lit up, she started clapping excitedly and exclaimed, "YAY! Daddy hasa go to tha dawtor!"

She's the only person who really seems to appreciate our healthcare system.

KREIKY!

Ava just had her one month checkup. The child weighs a whopping 10lbs, 2oz.

She was just 7lbs, 12oz when born...barely over FOUR weeks ago!

Not only that, she's jumped from 19 1/2 inches long to 22 1/4 inches long. Is someone feeding her steroids when I'm not looking??

Needless to say, I was very surprised. I even questioned the nurse's weight scale, which I'm sure she appreciated.

Other than being an Amazon Baby, Ava is doing wonderful. Showing signs of reflux but not nearly like it was with Isabella (thank God). She is a very happy baby, sleeps a more predictable schedule and is fascinated by her big sister. Doesn't even mind when Bella rubs her head all over Ava's face as if she were snuggling a kitten instead of a kid. A few curls in the eyeball never hurt anyone, right?

My mother-in-law scared me. She pointed out that my child is growing about a pound a week. There are 52 weeks in a year.

Then my brain turned back on and I scoffed at her suggestion. Pshaw.

It wouldn't, it couldn't happen. Right?

See? Even Ava is pondering the possibility.

Hmmm....I may not always be the little one to pick on, after all...

Watch out, Isabella and Cousin Channing!

Who's There?

Bella has learned her first joke. Now she likes to make up her own.

"Not, not"

Who's there?

"Owanj"

Orange, who?

"Owanj you gad to see me?" *giggle*


Then that spins into:

"Not, not"

Who's there?

"Bankie"

Um, blankie who?

"Bankie to wrap you up? " *bursts into laughter at her own cleverness*

"Wait! Wait! No!...Not, not!"

Who's there?

"ABA!"

Ava, who?

"Aba's gad to see you!!" *laughs so loud, her little sister's arms fling out in alarm*

Toddler Conversations Continued

BAM...BAM...BAM

"Bella! What are you doing?"

A little voice replies...

"I'm hittin the wall with baby's head!" (her doll, not her sister)

I ask why.

"Because...is noisy!"

I will not be asking her to babysit Ava anytime soon.


--------

A rustling noise comes from the kitchen. I go in and she's munching on something out of her pumpkin bag. I ask what she's got in there as I peek in at what looks like leaves. When I ask if it is leaves, she gives me a look as if I'm completely ridiculous.

"Noooooo Mommy (laughter), is SALAD."

Only my daughter would put green leaf lettuce in her candy bag. So proud of my lil' rabbit.

--------

It is too quiet in the gameroom so I tiptoe in to check things out. I enter the room to find her standing on her stroller next to the pool table. She is a little startled but recovers quick enough to put on her best innocent look and ask politely "Mama, won't you go in tha other woom?"

--------

So far it isn't the Terrible Twos as much as it is the Troublemaker Twos. And I'm okay with that.

The Not So Scary Fairy

It is Halloween. Bella isn't old enough to go trick-o-treating anywhere but her grandmother's and aunt's house. And it is the same costume as last year. Think she cares? NO WAY.

Cuz she's a "pitty pincess!"

We'll work on being lady-like next year.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

One Fine Day

Saturday we had our first family outing that didn't involve a shopping cart! Okay, there was a shopping cart but it wasn't ours, it was the homeless man's. But don't feel bad. After he dug around in the trash and found some leftovers from Sonic, my husband went and gave him

our left over picnic lunch.

Apparently Homeless Man gets plenty of food. He was far from skinny and gave most of the Doritos to his sidekick goose.

We had a great day and it was wonderful for Bella to play till she passed out on the way home.

"Mama, we're havin a goooooooood day!"

"Lookit me!"

Okay, Ava's not looking.

And a nap is looking pretty good about now...

Sweet dreams!

Tough Day

Yesterday was a bad, strange day.

We had to put our sweet 6 yr old Dachsund, Mollie, to sleep. It was sudden and surprising how sick she became and the vet could do nothing for her.

Turns out it was most likely pancreatitis. Very common in female, middle-age dogs her size. She could've had the disease for a long time and it just came in small spells. But this one was big enough to do too much damage too quickly. By the time my mother-in-law rushed Mollie to the vet, she was in shock and her temperature was so low, it didn't even register on the thermometer.

We got Mollie and Zeus when they were just 8 weeks old. Being first time breed buyers, we didn't do our research enough and ended up with two very sick puppies. Both nearly died from a kennel bacteria. We worked hard to nurse them back to health and for years both were very healthy, happy little dogs.

You may recall, this time last year, we had to rush Zeus into surgery for two ruptured discs in his lower back. He had a less than 50% chance of regaining use of his back legs. Mollie cared for him as he recovered. She loved on him and snuggled all day and night with him. Remarkably, he can not only walk using his back legs, he can run and even work up a couple of leg scratches with his left hind leg. He's an amazing little boy who's back to hunting squirrels and threatening neighbors on a daily basis.

We'll miss Mollie a great deal. She was spunky, stubborn, sweet and loving. I'm not sure what happens with a dog's spirit, if anything at all, but at least she no longer suffers and she was dearly loved by us and her brother.

Random Rant

Ever wonder why formula for babies is so dang expensive?

Let me tell you why...

1) Because they deliver crates of it to OB offices so nurses will hand them out to every expectant or new mother. Talk about a mixed message to new moms considering the Lactation Nazis who bothered her daily in the hospital!

2) Because they mail them to new moms (who they find via registration in hospitals) in obviously not cheap packaging containing two cans of completely different formula types (hello!)

3) Because of the expense of the materials used to market these formulas. Mailouts. Coupons. How To books on babies. Monthly baby info update booklets. Free diaper bags in the hospital (also containing free formula and all the items mentioned above)

I am all for educating women on how to better care for their babies. But wouldn't it be better to create a more affordable product? They can print all they want on the cans that "Breast Is Best" but you know as well as I do that they really prefer you buy their product. So why not make baby's nutrition easier to afford for moms who cannot or do not breastfeed?

Instead we have stupid government commercials promoting (weakly, I might add) breastfeeding over formula and then the formula companies going to great lengths to push their formula in mothers' faces while also admitting in fine print that breastfeeding is best.

I do not think the prices of formula vs. the marketing push for formula are in balance. I feel for any mother who has to fork over the $22 for one can of formula a week, if not more often.

I get really frustrated to see the free cans of formula wasted on mothers like me who breastfeed. I make it a point to donate the formula in hopes that a mother who cannot afford it will be able to use it; however, I imagine alot of free cans of formula are simply thrown away.

Yeah, may seem like an insignificant gripe, but I have a marketing background and an idea what these companies spend to promote their products only to have them be the most expensive necessity for so many babies.

K...I'm done ranting. Damn hormones. :)

The Beginnings of My Halloween Costume

Today Ava is three weeks old. On one hand, I can hardly believe! On the other hand, it seems she's been here alot longer. Well, visible, anyway :)

Not only is every pregnancy different, every delivery and every baby...apparently you can get a whole new set of issues with your hormones! Along with a reaction to the steri strips, I also had a reaction to my former friend, Vicodin. I was hosting my own Itchy Scratchy show.

Then Saturday, I woke up to this...

Those are not wax lips. They are mine, blown up about 3 times their normal size. Let me just say that I panicked slightly when I looked in the mirror at 3:35am after changing Ava's diaper. I rushed in to my husband, telling him to get up quick! He grabbed his glasses and leaped out of bed to kill the burglar.

When he saw me in the light, did he show great concern? No.

He handed me a Benadryl capsule, a frozen teething ring, kissed my forehead and stumbled back to bed.

I show you the above picture because 1) I do not know most of you in person and 2) my sister has already seen and laughed.

So as not to leave you with such a scary sight, how about this:

Where's the Calgon?

Ending week two with my two baby girls, I have to say that I absolutely LOVE having two children! I don't know why, but we feel so complete now. Balanced. My husband and I are big on that.

Isabella has been wonderful, overall, with her new sister. She does have toddler moments like dramatically throwing herself to the floor when Daddy holds Ava too long. Or rocking the bassinet with her eyes slanted our way knowing she's not supposed to touch it but trying to look as subtle as possible in her badness. She loves to kiss Ava, hug her and...YES...rub her ear lobes.

So far, Ava has protested the loudest of anyone. See Bella's look? Totally two.



I've healed really well other than a chemical reaction to the adhesive on the steri strips. Not a pretty sight, but I don't expect Playboy will be calling anytime soon so I'm not gonna sweat it. I'm off all meds and eating like a pig to keep up with my tiny piglet's feedings.

Ava is a wonderfully, sweet, calm baby. Completely opposite of her big sister already. She sleeps like a champ and when awake, rarely cries. She just tries to focus her eyes in the same direction. I imagine that takes alot of concentration. When she hears Bella, she turns her head immediately in that direction. I love that!

I'm tired but very happy. My sister, her family and my brother are coming to visit this weekend. I plan to take long naps, allowing my sister to fall in love with having an infant around again (sorry, Daniel!) and letting Bella soak up as much attention as she likes and needs.

Thank you everyone for all the sweet words about our baby girl. It is just as thrilling this time around as it was with our first child.

She's Here!

Ava Elizabeth was born on Monday, October 2 at 3:18. She weighed a full two pounds more than Isabella at 7 lbs, 12 oz and is 19 1/2 long. I can't get over her chunky cheeks!

















She is perfectly healthy and sleeps like an angel. She took to nursing immediately which is a relief. Isabella loooooooves her little sister and likes to kiss her...alot. As well as pat her back a little too enthusiastically. But we're working on being more gentle :)





















I am healing well with the help of my little friend, Vicodin. Doesn't matter how it is spelled because it still ROCKS.

Needless to say, my husband and I are elated with the new addition to our family. You really do find that your heart grows with more love for each child!

I'll post more later. Ava's placed an order for lunch.